Blood, Blade, and Thruster

Isn't that a wicked name for a magazine?

Some months ago, a random guy sent me an email. Happens all the time. You know how it goes: "Mr. Sizemore, I love your magazine. Why can't you publish on a monthly, even weekly schedule? I want more!" I get used to such things.

But this email, it had something different. It seemed that random guy wanted to tap my brain for knowledge. Well, that happens a lot too: "Mr. Sizemore, might you grace my unworthy story for just a few seconds of your editorial time?"

As I read further into the query, I discovered a most surprising thing. This poor sap was coming to me for advice on how to start a new magazine! I snorted, I hee-hawed. I write this gentleman back.

"Dear Mr. Magazine Guy, Have you not heard of the Apex Plan for World Domination? It's even on our mugs. Just give up."

Turns out, I sent the email to some chump that calls himself Mr. Magazine. GMail can be tricky sometimes.

So I tried again. I poured my heart out to the upstart. Told him stories about the magazine business that would bring a heartless man to tears. This guy took the better parts of my advice, and a few months later a nifty new publication came to life.

That magazine: Blood, Blade, and Thruster
This guy: Lucien Spelman

While I'm always nervous trading advertising with small, upstart magazines, Lucien appeared to have some business sense. The end result: a nifty BB&T ad in issue seven of Apex. And Apex has an ad in the first issue of BB&T.

Last week, I finally got my ad copy of BB&T #1.

Initial thoughts: Attractive cover art. Whoever did the digital art for BB&T has some serious talent. It's a picture of a fey little man with some device attached to his skull that connects with a wire to the skull of a cute little mouse on a table in front of him. The lettering on the cover needs to be larger and contrast a little more, but otherwise, rather nice. The back side has a well designed color ad.

What about the content? The fiction was a mix of "very good" to "meh." But like I tell people who complain about particular stories in Apex, you can't please all the people all the time. For a first issue, the fiction quality overall is good. Two of the pieces struck me as very good which is about what I grade any random issue of F&SF I read.

"Almost Heroic" By S.J. Pierce - The opening story about a sissy messenger man who is stabbed with a magical sword. It's funny, sweet, and sad all at once. VERY GOOD

"The Most Selfish Man in All of Stretford" By Gregory Adams - A "monkey's paw" story about a soccer-obsessed fan, zombies, and an angry spirit. Average.

"Princess Lily's Wedding" By Robert J. Santa - A twisted take on the frog-princess fairy tale. This one almost makes it to 'good', but the lead up to the twist went too long.

"Some Units Like It Heated" By Blake Hutchins - This one about an alien studying the human race, had me laughing with bemusement. The setup isn't particularly original: an alien comes to earth dressed as Marilyn Monroe because it has discovered via our television signals that Marilyn Monroe produces positive physical reactions in earthlings. It's the plot and execution that make this one a winner. Our Marilyn lands in the middle of hooker-ville, ends up with a pimp, and has some bizarre experiences. Good stuff. VERY GOOD

"Changing For Dinner" By Kathleen Wallace - A decent story of a family and dinner preparations.

"Making Up For Lost Time" By James Harris - Another decent story about a watchmaker and lost time. Well-written and more serious. My only problem with the story is that it didn't match the tone of the rest of BB&T.

Some of the non-fiction work is outright genius. They certainly do have an interview with the great Neil Gaiman. This one is almost worth the price of the magazine. The "Letters from Earl" section had me guffawing with delight. I'm a sucker for jokes about clogging. There rest of the non-fiction is serviceable and as good as most other genre magazines.

Overall, a solid first effort. My recommendation is that after you've spent your money on the latest copies of Apex, give these guys a shot. While Apex is a dead-serious dark-scifi/horror magazine, BB&T looks to the lighter side of the genres and is a good way to cleanse the pallet of all the body harvesting, trepanning, and alien cannabilism you'll read about in Apex.

Here's their website: http://www.bbtmagazine.com
Cost: $5.99 + shipping

BB&T, I give you alien head.